Cat Diary: Candycanecat's Very Early Tree Practice

Everyone knows that Candycanecat spends the whole of December hanging about on the Christmas tree. What fewer people know is how much practice that takes. Today, Candycanecat decided, was the day training began.

6.30am. Up with a jingle. The little gold bell on Candycanecat's green bow is the bakery's unofficial alarm clock, and this morning it was ringing early and often. Muffincat put a paw over both ears and went back to sleep in the bread basket.

8am. Warm-up stretches. Candycanecat hooked onto the edge of the counter, then the handle of the flour bin, then the end of Pretzelcat's tail (by accident, and with a lot of apologising). Pretzelcat, being the bendiest cat in the bakery, simply tied into a bow and laughed.

10am. First attempt on the tree. The bakery's little tree had appeared by the window overnight, which Candycanecat insisted was a coincidence. The lowest branch held beautifully. The second branch wobbled. The third branch was declared "one for December".

1pm. Lunch break, with a peppermint tea. Candycanecat explained to anyone who would listen that everything tastes better with a hint of peppermint, including, possibly, sausage rolls. Pizzacat was not convinced.

3pm. Snow began to fall outside the window (only a flurry, but it counts). Candycanecat sat very still beside the tree to watch it, which is the longest anyone has ever seen Candycanecat sit still. The bell did not jingle once.

5pm. Final practice of the day: singing the same carol eleven times in a row while swinging gently from the lowest branch. The bakery record stands at fourteen, held by Candycanecat, and there is a strong feeling it will be broken before December.

Candycanecat's verdict: "Two months of training to go, and the lowest branch is already mine."

If Candycanecat has jingled your bells, come and meet Candycanecat properly, or take a look at the Candycanecat Christmas T-shirt and the cosy Candycanecat sweatshirt in the shop.